The scariest moment

“The scariest moment is always just before you start. After that, things can only get better.” ~Stephen King

I’ve been doing lots of things lately that scare me. This process of setting up a business seems to involve a whole list of things that I find quite scary—from sorting out government filing regulations to figuring out liability insurance options to learning to market myself. Getting through each hurdle seems to bring along a new one for me to face.

However, I’m finding that Stephen King is right. It’s always scariest right before I start one of these new things. Once I get moving, I get too busy focusing on what needs to be done to put as much energy into the fear. It’s not that it isn’t still scary, it’s more that I gradually discover that it’s not going to kill me and that I can handle it better than I thought I could. As my confidence improves, the fear naturally diminishes.

“Putting off doing what scares us and brings up fear only creates more obstacles in our lives.” ~DailyOM

My usual method of dealing with things that scare me is to put them off in the hopes that they will go away. That’s never really worked for me, but it was one of those patterns that I just kept trying to make work. I found this DailyOM quote some times ago and have been reading it frequently, and it’s finally starting to help me shift that old unhelpful pattern.

There are some areas that are not showing much improvement, but this whole endeavor to start a business is one area that I’m managing to shift my normal pattern into one that is working much better for me. In the process, I’m discovering that as I keep tackling these things that scare me and successfully accomplishing each thing in turn, my building confidence is helping me feel more capable for tackling each of the ones that follow. In turn, I’m finding the confidence to tackle even things unrelated to the business that I’ve been putting off for too long, and it feels good to no longer have those scary things hanging over my head.

I think the more I try this new pattern and find that not only do things get easier (and less scary) once I get started but that it reduces the number of obstacles I have to deal with along the way, this could easily become my new default pattern. If tackling something right away makes the scariness and hassle decrease, that’s all the motivation I need to tackle it sooner rather than later. It’s a real shame I didn’t discover this many years ago!

A Note on Comments: A chrysalis is by nature a fragile and vulnerable place to be, so I am committed to keeping this a safe place for me and for my readers. Comments sharing your own journey, even if your experience is different from mine, are always welcome and encouraged. Expressions of support or encouragement are also welcome. Comments that criticize, disparage, correct, or in any way attempt to undermine the validity of another person’s experience or personal insight are not welcome here and will be deleted.