“All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous unpremeditated act without benefit of experience.” –Henry Miller
Although my life has been filled with abundance and many blessings lately, these blessings are also appearing in the form of massive change. In less than a year, everything about my life has been turned upside down. There is no part of my life that is untouched – even my physical appearance and my name are changing. There is nothing I once knew about myself that is unchanged. So even when the changes are good, it leaves me extraordinarily unsettled to have no firm ground upon which to stand while trying to cope with all this. I feel uprooted in every sense, and the stress of this is exhausting me.
I am trying to approach all of this change as an opportunity for growth. If I am going to be uprooted, then I might as well use this as an opportunity to be re-planted in a way that will allow me to grow to reach new heights and new healthiness. And yet, when I am standing in the middle of this storm, uprooted and off balance, how do I know which direction leads to growth? How do I find that new place of solid ground to re-root myself in safety and stability with the space and conditions I need for health and growth? How do I choose growth when I am leaping in the dark with no experience to guide me?
I have no answers. I can only trust that right intention and the abundance of the universe will guide me even when I cannot see the way. In the meantime, it is of some comfort to know that I am not alone in finding this leap towards growth to be a leap in the dark. The panic comes and goes—and likely will for quite some time—but in time, I will find solid ground once again and re-root myself. I cling to that hope.